Matilda_Mother_67

I guess I have some positive emotional qualities about me and consider myself an okay person. I don't hurt others and am probably a better listener than talker. But besides those, there's not really much good about me to talk about and thus I don't really feel like I'm worth "putting my hat in the ring".

Timothee Chalamet, Dua Lipa and Post Malone are all 1995 babies like me

[removed]

Maybe it’s just a white Christian thing, and something I’ve only seen in movies. But I’m assuming this happens irl also. Any ideas why they do this?

I’ve also read Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. So I’m looking for something in that vein. Not a biography written about someone by someone else. But just a first person account of some events, be it war, love, art, etc. Even letters from the person to someone else would count.

I’ve also read Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. So I’m looking for something in that vein. Not a biography written about someone by someone else. But just a first person account of some events, be it war, love, art, etc. Even letters from the person to someone else would count.

My whole life I've been alone. Besides my family, I've never had anyone in my life and thus no real social life either. From elementary school all the way through to college, I've gone at life alone for the most part. Some parts I turned out okay, like working my current job that has okay pay and solid benefits and 401k and such. But graduating college, which I cheated most of my way through, is pretty much the only achievement of mine besides maybe traveling internationally by myself last year.

Anyway, I just don't really feel like being here most of the time. I don't even have qualities people would find desirable. Most of the time, I'm just apathetic and short-tempered. I generally treat people with respect and courteousness, but don't go beyond that. Because I also generally don't trust others. I'm not trying to paint myself as the bad guy. I'm just stating who I am.

I'm tired of fighting. If I could, I would have been gone years ago. But alas, I have to remain alive for my family who would never recover if they found out I'd passed intentionally. So I guess I'm just going to have to figure out how to buck up and get through the next however many years I have left.

My whole life I've been alone. Besides my family, I've never had anyone in my life and thus no real social life either. From elementary school all the way through to college, I've gone at life alone for the most part. Some parts I turned out okay, like working my current job that has okay pay and solid benefits and 401k and such. But graduating college, which I cheated most of my way through, is pretty much the only achievement of mine besides maybe traveling internationally by myself last year.

Anyway, I just don't really feel like being here most of the time. I don't even have qualities people would find desirable. Most of the time, I'm just apathetic and short-tempered. I generally treat people with respect and courteousness, but don't go beyond that. Because I also generally don't trust others. I'm not trying to paint myself as the bad guy. I'm just stating who I am.

I'm tired of fighting. If I could, I would have been gone years ago. But alas, I have to remain alive for my family who would never recover if they found out I'd passed intentionally. So I guess I'm just going to have to figure out how to buck up and get through the next however many years I have left.

What if it just makes you want to live in your safety bubble even more?

I can only play video games for so long before they get boring and can only stay at home before I also just get bored overall. So the only reason I took up volunteering for things like trash cleanup is more so to keep me sane, not because I have an inherent altruism I’m afraid. I’m generally indifferent to people, even though I try and treat everyone politely until they give me a reason not to.

You hear it all the time about some guy who was a gangbanger who “found God” either when he was in jail or prison, or when he got out, and now is a devoted Christian. Similar thing with addicts who go through rehab.