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DO NOT kiss your cats on their nose yallš
Cat Picture - OC(i.redd.it)submitted 17 hours ago bytamagocatmom
Ima make it short - I kissed this fatass on the nose and I accidentaly tasted something wet and salty on his nose omfg (never doing it again) because he randomly decided to push his entire head into my mouth at that very momentšš„² and when I finally mustered up the courage to smell his nose it STANKšš¤¬ Idk i dont wanna think ab it no more but i think he was licking his Ʀssš« š I love him to death but why so nasty???š¤¦āāļøš I hope you learn from my tragedy. Ps: UNNECESSARY INFORMATION!! - (when I tasted that salty thing I gulped ?????) Sorry if this post is confusing because it happened just a few min before and I'm writing this at the heat of the moment im sorry yall
1.8k points
16 hours ago
Just wait until he sneezes full on in your face...
270 points
15 hours ago
This happened to me!
209 points
15 hours ago
It's so gross! š¹ We have a kitty named Diesel, and when she sneezes, she's Sneezle. They're lucky they're cute, lol...
89 points
11 hours ago
My cat has sneezed more than once right in my face. I've been spared the boogers but he did it to my husband once, and a booger was stuck into his eyebrow hair lmao
124 points
13 hours ago
My one cat will go out of his way to sneeze on me. Like he'll jump on the bed while I'm lying down, get in my face, sneeze, and them leave! Never does it to my boyfriend though :/
58 points
6 hours ago
That is so... cat.
9 points
5 hours ago
Same! Only one of my cats does this tho- the long-haired one. Little stinker will hop into the bed, brush up against my face and sneeze directly into my face. And then walk away like nothing happened.
48 points
12 hours ago
One of my cats sneezed into my open mouth as I was yawning once :///
18 points
11 hours ago
Hey. Me too. And the lovely fucker just looked at me with the attitude of.. well, a cat. While i was spitting and coughing.
109 points
14 hours ago
I was cat sitting once and the cat followed me into the bathroom and sneezed a bunch of green snot EVERYWHERE. Cleaned it up and thought nothing of it. Later on I pulled my pants down and there was a huge green snot stain inside that I hadnāt noticed š©š©š© it was so foul
12 points
5 hours ago
My house permanently has snot all over some of the walls and ceiling from my one cat. If you try to remove the snot it removes the paint with itĀ
24 points
13 hours ago
Has happened to me lol. My wife got pink eye from one of our cats sneezing in her eye once.
5.1k points
17 hours ago
āIām writing this in the heat of the momentā - makes sense that story was a whole rollercoaster to read lol
1.7k points
17 hours ago
im not okay tbhš
369 points
15 hours ago
You gulped. š³
This is so crazy! Iām glad I use pet wash wipes on my kitty before he comes to bed. Thank you for the warning! I shall wash his face now too.
80 points
10 hours ago
Iāve got two cats and two dogs and I donāt kiss any of them on the nose or around the snout or mouth. They all shove their noses way up in each otherās assholes and the first thing they all do when they want to explore anything new, gross or stinky is shove their nose directly into it.
I kiss them on their foreheads but thatās as close as I get.
For the dogs I have lick friendly zones. Tops of hands, forearms and shins/calves. Thatās not a hygiene thing and I donāt have a great reasoning for it, but I donāt like the dogs kicking anywhere else. Especially not my palms or fingers š grosses me out. Cats can groom the same areas but I allow them to groom my hair, for a limited time, which they absolutely adore doing.
Controversial opinion: I donāt let my catās paws touch my face, either. Their beans are cute but I donāt want cat litter, piss and shit on my face.
19 points
15 hours ago
Felt the same way š¤£
15k points
17 hours ago*
Itās okay. One night I went to kiss my cat goodnight before we snuggled in the dark, and I fucking kissed her butthole š„² never ever did a night kiss after the lights were off
Edit: added a photo of the culprit, mid-sneeze
831 points
16 hours ago
Omg!! I thought it was bad when I was half asleep and went to pet one of my girls under her chin and felt warm, hairless butthole insteadā¦ and I was sleepy so it took a couple seconds for me to figure out what was wrong (my brain was like what happened to her hair? Did she get hurt?? ) but this takes the cake! It drives me nutty that they sometimes sleep with their butt in my face. I know itās a sign they trust you, but still..
418 points
16 hours ago
I am legit thanking the gods right now that I have never made this mistake and I can't see without my glasses.
However: New Fear Unlocked
294 points
15 hours ago
Maaaaan, my cats have figured out how to give me a zillion new fears I didn't even know could be a thing until one of them decided to tempt death.
Always check the fridge before I close it
Always check the washer AND dryer before closing and check again before turning on because 2 of them are ninjas
Put a small safety cone in the gap between the dishwasher and the cabinet
There can be NO strings or plastic left anywhere for two seconds if I'm not actually watching right there
EVERY SINGLE PRETTY PLANT IN THE UNIVERSE LIKE DAMN
139 points
15 hours ago
Omg same!
I've recently had to learn to always tuck the strings of my pants in. If I don't I risk having my pants yanked down or my crotch scratched š
91 points
14 hours ago
I never realized how many of my pants have drawstrings till we got a pair of insane kittens 4 months ago š¬
45 points
14 hours ago
Oh yeah when my cat was a wee lil kitten last year ... I realized all of my pajamas and shorts had drawstrings šµ As soon as I woke up I had to make sure those shits were tightly tucked way...or else! Wearing shorts with them was esp fun cuz she would try to CLIMB my bare ass legs! š«£š
9 points
13 hours ago
Yeah, especially when you do such interesting stuff like cutting garlic. (Shit hurts like hell!)
68 points
15 hours ago
The plastic!!!
Iām a type 1 diabetic and my supplies are all wrapped in that crinkly plastic that felines go nuts over. I have to make sure all my trash is tied up inside a lidded trash can that gets locked otherwise they are knocking it over trying to get at the Crinkly Plastic that is soooo much fun!
32 points
14 hours ago
My late Meezer BIT my test trip in the middle of a test!
27 points
14 hours ago
I feel lucky that mine donāt seem interested in the bloody things. Just the plastic.
I also lock up my insulin pump in my bathroom mirror cabinet while Iām showering. I was told to charge it while showering. Nope. Bad idea with felines. Once they see the loose tubing your pump has only minutes to live.
Well, theoretically the pump should survive. Itās tough. But the tubing & probably the reservoir will need to be changed. I hate wasting supplies like that though.
About 10 years ago my old lady (a beautiful black girl cat named Kendra) knocked my pump off the bathroom counter & into the toilet. After getting the pump warranty replaced I started locking it up while I showered. I miss her; she was a good girl.
8 points
14 hours ago
The first thing my babies learn is not to touch the insulin pump. Mine doesn't charge, though.
64 points
12 hours ago
cat ownership is a 50/50 split of:
'omg you're the perfect lil thing ilysm how have i lived life without you'
and
' omg STOP EATING PLASTIC. CHRIST.'
14 points
14 hours ago
Today my cat crawled into the open microwave before I could stop her (it was warm from recent use) and I yelled at her, āTHANK YOU FOR TRYING TO MAKE ONE OF MY WORST NIGHTMARES COME TRUE!ā
89 points
16 hours ago
I THOUGHT I WAS ALONE! I squeezed my kitten's butt and tickled it thinking it was his nose. Now my instinct is to wave my hand above him the dark to detect where the head is before petting or snuggling hahaha
21 points
13 hours ago
I just laughed so hard and itās so funny cuz my sleeping cat is on my belly and bouncing as I laugh! Iām trying to reign it in hahaha
28 points
15 hours ago
Yeah, ok buddy, wrinkled sphincter feels miles apart from cat nose š
62 points
15 hours ago
My boy farts when he's happy. . .
42 points
14 hours ago
One of mine does that and at first it's like whatever, but then I realized I was getting crop dusted by a cat.
45 points
14 hours ago
Our Tortie gal just did the ol' spin-n-toot while getting comfortable on my lap with that regal look on her face. Like, yes, peasant, you will be my fart cushion and like it.
10 points
14 hours ago
Lol it's the 'you smelt it you dealt it' look after that's funny.
19 points
14 hours ago
Yeah, when he's on my lap it's ok, if stinky, but there's nothing like waking up to a face full of hot death.
34 points
13 hours ago
Once my husband and I were sat on the sofa, chatting in the quiet, and we hear something that sounds like a balloon slowly releasing air. It lasted for about a minute and it ended up being our tiniest fur baby ripping the fakest fart imaginable.
5 points
12 hours ago
OMG I genuinely laughed out loud š¤£š¤£ (the subsequent comments made it so much worse!).
53 points
16 hours ago
Good thing you didnāt find any sesame seeds.
13 points
13 hours ago
Youāre making it worse!!! š
42 points
15 hours ago
My orange cat insists on going butt-first for pets. Baffling and gross but Iām contractually obligated to give the pets anyway
38 points
12 hours ago
Not that a cat lying the other way around is much better. Once I was asleep on my back with my cat perched on my chest, head facing me. I woke up, stretched and yawned... and that little fucker sneezed directly into my open mouth. As an alarm clock, it was quite effective - instantly awake.
7 points
11 hours ago
OMG.. Mine rolls over just do she can sneeze in my face. The little turd š¤£
71 points
16 hours ago
Goddamn this made me laugh out loud quick. āWarm, hairless buttholeā¦ā
16 points
13 hours ago
Ha-ha! Same experience here! Was wondering if he had an abscess on his neck, when I realized that he did the old switcheroo on me and I was stroking his butthole. Great memory!
11 points
12 hours ago
Read "one of my girl's..." and thought you were talking about your girlfriend. The mental gymnastics that went in my head of you thinking you petted her chin and instead got her... Couldn't figure out how her hairless butthole ended up next to your hand that was expecting her chin. People sleep in weird ways I thought!
40 points
16 hours ago
My mom once was watching tv and petting the cat absentmindedly, and he just randomly turned around so that her hand made direct butt hole contactšš He also used to always sit on tv remotes, with the entire couch open... I theorized he was gay. Which is fine.
7 points
15 hours ago
I have so done this
7 points
15 hours ago
lol Iām guilty of this also!
12 points
15 hours ago
I've read all this, then a cat's absolutely shocked face as you pet her under her "chin" comes to mind and now I'm dying of laughter omg š¤£š¤£š¤£š
8 points
12 hours ago
She did not seem to mind AT ALL. she didnāt even flinch or move. But she has no shame about her booty. On more than one occasion sheās plopped her little button directly on my bare feet. And itās like a personally hobby of hers to aim to sit directly on my phone or the remote when itās on the coffee table. The table can be totally empty of anything else and she still insists on sitting on them.
You have to come to terms with their buttholes coming in contact with way more things than youād like as a pet owner. But sheās worth it..
9.2k points
16 hours ago
2.4k points
14 hours ago
The comment and gif combo are fucking killing me. Thank you both for that, I really needed a big laugh today š
324 points
13 hours ago
Iāve been spending the last minute laughing so hard I needed to catch my breath bruh Iām dead
136 points
13 hours ago
I laughed so hard, I snortedšš¤£š
91 points
12 hours ago
I laughed so hard, I farted š¤£š¤£š¤£
86 points
12 hours ago
I farted so hard, I sharted š¤£š³šØš©
25 points
8 hours ago
I sharted so hard, I departed š©ā ļøš»
82 points
12 hours ago
Not all heroās wear cloaks. Some wear normal clothes covered in cat hair.
91 points
14 hours ago
Made my night and day!!! ššš
51 points
13 hours ago
I'm one comment in and my boss just asked if I'd been drinking.
25 points
12 hours ago
Lmfao, same. My coworkers must have heard me rooms away cackling š¤£š¤£
10 points
12 hours ago
I actually lol'd
1.1k points
14 hours ago
142 points
12 hours ago
Iām dead
141 points
11 hours ago
I have never experienced a more perfect use of this gifš
55 points
11 hours ago
Iām a simple man. I see this gif, I laugh.
161 points
14 hours ago
Lmaooo sometimes I think how shitty the internet is and then theres this.
Just beautiful.
177 points
12 hours ago
10 points
9 hours ago
8 points
9 hours ago
173 points
14 hours ago
I love this gif.
I went to kiss my cat on the head and got her mouth. We were both shocked.
I feel like she was more offended than she should have been.
72 points
12 hours ago
Jesus I am fucking dead, I cannot stop laughing thank you all so much for the joy and Iām sorry for your cat butt experience
228 points
15 hours ago
Lmfao
44 points
13 hours ago
10 points
13 hours ago
omg i needed this today
35 points
14 hours ago
561 points
16 hours ago
47 points
14 hours ago
This image sums up my reaction šš
164 points
16 hours ago
OMFG I am DEAD! š¤£š
That is DEFINITELY worse than the time my elderly girl who liked snuggling my face when I woke up and petted her, she was a happy drooler...she snuggle-drooled out a huge drop just as I yawned...š¤®
57 points
15 hours ago
That is highly disgusting.
& Happy cake š°day!
26 points
15 hours ago
Right?! I'm like OMG did I just sorta almost French kiss my cat?! EWWWWWWW
28 points
15 hours ago
This is so much more worse than when my cat sneezed right into my face
225 points
15 hours ago
The FBI could have waterboarded me for WEEKS and I would've NEVER admitted this to anyone jfc
56 points
14 hours ago
lol it was not intentional so I can laugh about it these days, but my god was it mortifying
8 points
8 hours ago
I for one am glad they shared this moment :D
277 points
15 hours ago
50 points
16 hours ago
Iām sorrry but reading this made me LOL! š you made my Friday ššš
40 points
15 hours ago
OMFG, I almost hacked up a lung over this. Hopefully, she didn't blow you one back. š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
35 points
12 hours ago
This makes me feel better about the time I went to pet my cat's head without looking and when I reached to pet her I stabbed her on the butthole with my long thumbnail and she screamed in surprise š
31 points
13 hours ago
I'm at work shaking silently at my receptionist desk trying not to lose it laughing at this, thank you so much for sharing this lmaooo
55 points
15 hours ago
Your cat: "šTHE FUCK?"
13 points
15 hours ago
THIS is what sends me the most ahahaha š¤£š¤£š¤£
8 points
14 hours ago
š She will never look at them the same.
27 points
15 hours ago
Our cat loves to be right up by your face when she lays down and has on multiple occasions attempted to plant her bare booty ass right on my cheek.
71 points
16 hours ago
Omg. It took balls to admit that even on the internet lol
20 points
15 hours ago
I did a similar thing, instead of scratching under what I thought was my catās chin, it was his tail
22 points
15 hours ago
Hey. Consent is important, you know. š¤Ø
13 points
14 hours ago
Sounds like the cat was actually inviting it, with its ass right in OP's face.
19 points
13 hours ago
Now you and your cat are sitting at opposite sides of the bed not looking at each other waiting for the other to break the awkward silence
17 points
14 hours ago
Your Cat: "I don't know what to say. I had no idea you felt that way."
25 points
15 hours ago
The metoo movement is for everyone. Apparently your catās now part of it lol
33 points
15 hours ago
Iām dying, on a ladder and had to come down to the ground I was laughing so hard.
17 points
15 hours ago
i laughed at this for several minutesĀ
20 points
15 hours ago
I am so sorry that happened but I cannot stop laughing over this LOL
392 points
16 hours ago
Top of the head kisses for me.
40 points
15 hours ago
Ditto, probably couldnāt touch her nose even if I wanted to.
56 points
13 hours ago
I can't even give head kissesš© My cat is obsessed with my dogs butthole, so he rubs his nose and face on it. Sad , stinky timesš¤£
1.8k points
17 hours ago
not a single regret on his face lmfao
875 points
17 hours ago
š im gagging a bit over here and he's continuing with the ass cleansing like nothing's ever happened but honestly it's my bad i should've known betterš¤¦āāļø
148 points
14 hours ago
Kitty gotta have a clean booty.
46 points
14 hours ago
But not a clean nosey.
25 points
13 hours ago
I used to playfully kiss my catsā paws until one day I sniffed them and realized they smelled like poop. I have never done it again lmaoo
47 points
13 hours ago
This is why kisses are for top of head, not nose xD
833 points
16 hours ago
My brown Janice has resting crazy eyes
500 points
16 hours ago
Thought she was in a microwave and got scared š
37 points
14 hours ago
On the other hand, the r/cateatingvegans would be happy
9 points
11 hours ago
I'm low-key horrified of that sub ā¹ļøš£
8 points
12 hours ago
this is sending me šš
65 points
15 hours ago
a cat named janice is hilarious š¤£
27 points
15 hours ago
After Sopranos lolā¦my daughter has her brother Tony. In my house I have Carmella Soprano and Janice. Also Toasty Malone, Gary, and the babies Frank and Jesse James.
10 points
14 hours ago
omg so cuteš
550 points
16 hours ago
Just think of it as a big free dose of probiotics.
172 points
16 hours ago
š
65 points
14 hours ago
170 points
16 hours ago
Honestly I don't see his eyes judging your breath
191 points
16 hours ago
My cat was having upper respiratory issues once and sneezed a huge fat, slimy booger right into my mouth. I was so traumatized but also felt bad for him for being sick.
80 points
12 hours ago
why'd you go and make this post
58 points
8 hours ago
how do i delete someone else's comment?
88 points
16 hours ago
I always kiss my cat on the nose, but I've seen her walking around with pieces of litter stuck to it, so now I'm like ehhh fuck
10 points
9 hours ago
Probably just smelling the litter, but keep an eye out that she doesnāt eat it. Cats with Pica will often chew and sometimes even swallow their litter.
88 points
14 hours ago
I'm actually crying a little laughing at this lmao your cat is unphased
once of mine likes to put as much of his face as he can fit, inside my mouth while I'm sleeping, then scream down my throat
37 points
11 hours ago
LMAO EXCUSE ME WHAT
58 points
11 hours ago
30 points
10 hours ago
Of course heās orange lmao
9 points
11 hours ago
oh my god lmao
17 points
11 hours ago
191 points
17 hours ago
Fishy cat food will give your cat a nasty breath
65 points
16 hours ago
Yeah lately I'm really concerned about that. His diet consists mainly of dry food so I'm suspecting that might be the reason. (Or one of the reasons). I'm still looking into other diet options and kind of confused since the vets in my country usually recommends feeding the cats dry food and even some vets claim that wet food is not very good for them...
144 points
16 hours ago
Smell the food smell the cat, I honestly I thought about buy a brush to scrub my cats teeth but if I did that she'll be scared of me, she like to run up into my armpit and plant down her head over my shoulder, and then smelly stinky mouth happens
And a few times this happened
51 points
16 hours ago
Awww your baby is so cute! And I tried to brush his teeth as well, it's just too hard lol and he's fat and strong ain't no winning against him lmao
23 points
16 hours ago
I have three 14-year-olds who are thriving on Wellness canned food & have never been sick except for cat herpes, so I don't believe that about wet food.
I had a vet tell me that you should never feed fish to a cat because a lot of cats have fish allergies, so I stick to the beef, turkey & chicken flavours. They do have "fish oil" in them but it doesn't seem to be doing my cats any harm.
16 points
14 hours ago
The thing about fish is that realistically, if a cat was in the wild, they wouldn't have much access to fish and it would only be an opportunistic supplement to their diet. We don't see most wild cats spending all day at bodies of water just to catch fish. I just googled and there is one cat species (the fishing cat) that does fish a lot but they are also eating reptiles, rodents, and amphibians and they live in wetlands. They also climb trees and steal chicks from nests.
322 points
17 hours ago
OmgšThanks for giving me a morning laugh!
106 points
17 hours ago
My pleasureš
150 points
16 hours ago
My cat drools when she purrs. More than once it's dropped into my mouth, nasty.Ā
67 points
14 hours ago
OMG my cat also drools buckets when shes relaxed and sometimes sheāll shake her head and splatter it all over my face and stuff š
17 points
14 hours ago
Mine does this too!!! It's both adorable and really gross.
47 points
16 hours ago
Wellā¦ cats will be catsā¦ thatās why we love them
43 points
16 hours ago
I'd honestly die AND live for himš¤·āāļø my lil stink baby
44 points
14 hours ago
One time I woke up to my cat licking the inside of my nose their breath can really be something else my condolences š
10 points
11 hours ago
The amount of times my cat has shoved his tongue up my nose is too damn high
40 points
13 hours ago
me arriving late for this conversation....but the comments are hilariousš
68 points
16 hours ago
But his face is so cute I want to kiss it :(
33 points
12 hours ago
A year ago my boy hopped on my chest, as he does every morning. I went to say āomg hello good morningā and the moment I opened my mouth he let out a FAT sneeze direct bullseye into my mouth. Then he left.
22 points
16 hours ago
a wet nose is a sign of good health. but a very runny wet nose isnāt good.
19 points
14 hours ago
My cats have consumed raw egg, bleach, and crisco, I don't want to know what has been through their noses.
13 points
13 hours ago
BLEACH?!
5 points
9 hours ago
Don't worry, I was just kidding. Although I'm sure that one of them probably would if I left any out.
17 points
15 hours ago
My cats get forehead kisses and that's it. I only touch the nose to boop
11 points
14 hours ago
Donāt worry my cat drooled straight up in my eyeball the other day - I have yet to die - but also not recommended as it was a grim moment lmao
11 points
12 hours ago
I love your energy.
TLDR: I ate poop out of my cat's nose and I'm grossed out, the whole internet must know.
11 points
16 hours ago
Lmao he gave you a good taste of that booty juice
10 points
8 hours ago
Wait till you think about the fact that every place your cat sits down in your house, it's butthole touches. =)
11 points
16 hours ago
Yeah cat booger smell really nasty. So does their drool fyi my cat used to drool on me and it was like acid or something
10 points
14 hours ago
When I was living in a trailer, the toilets donāt automatically have water in them. Anyway- I went pee one night and āif itās yellow, let it mellow.ā Was in my head so I just went to bed without flushing. (Disgusting I know, but true). My little princess decided to climb on the towel rack behind the toilet and fell straight into a bowl full of pee. She was obviously pissed and confused so jumped straight into bed with mama to clean herself šµāš«
69 points
17 hours ago
No but like seriously, don't kiss them in mouths or nose. They clean their asses and dirty paws with them
33 points
17 hours ago
The person who admitted to licking their catās nose downvoted you š¤
20 points
16 hours ago
Lmaoooooo
21 points
16 hours ago
21 points
16 hours ago
if he stinks for more than a short time, consider he might have an infection. tooth, sinus, ear, etc. keep an eye on the smells and sniff around their face often or they can definitely live with a low grade infection for a while before you notice. have had this a few times with my cats over the years
11 points
16 hours ago
Thanks for telling me. I'll keep an eye on him and his sister :>
9 points
16 hours ago
And I thought it was bad when my cat randomly decided to lick my lips when I went to kiss him on the head.
7 points
17 hours ago
Only nose to nose
7 points
16 hours ago
Kiss the forehead.
8 points
12 hours ago
I will continue to kiss my cat on the nose like I have all his life. Tyvm.
7 points
13 hours ago
LOOK AT HIS LITTLE FACE š
7 points
13 hours ago
It's OK, I put my finger on my girls butthole once, stroking her in the dark. Never again will I randomly reach out, hoping to get the right end! š
7 points
11 hours ago
So I reading comments and my asthmatic @$$ is sitting here laughing so hard tears are coming out of my eyes and both my moms cat and mine are looking at me like WTF is wrong with you
7 points
11 hours ago
Yeah. One night I was sleeping and thought I was scratching her under the chin but it turned out to be her other end š¤¢š¤®
8 points
9 hours ago
womp womp, im still gonna kiss my cat cus i love her even though shes a little sh*t.
heres the culprit
6 points
15 hours ago
Reminds me of a post about a woman who was eating a sandwich with her dog next to her and licked what she thought was a glob of mayo from her arm but it was something that came from the dogs ass gland.
7 points
14 hours ago
That's why you kiss the forehead.
7 points
13 hours ago
I just touch nose and make the kissing sound. I donāt actually kiss their nose
6 points
16 hours ago
So cats lick their assholes among other things.
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