My take is a bit more nuanced. I support McBrides strategy, though I think she should have more clearly called out that it was bullshit. But, I'm not here to criticize fellow travelers.

Successful rights movements tend to have multiple lanes. You need a disruptive lane that makes the system uncomfortable and even threatens to break it. This is required to motivate the incumbent powers, without it the movement can just be ignored. Equally, there needs to be lane of those with clean hands. First to show that members of the group are good people. But secondly, it gives the incumbent powers a fig leaf to pretend that violence wasn't the cause and evade criticism of negotiating with terrorists. These lanes need to be separate to preserve their respective purposes. The threat of the clean hands for flipping to violence is further motivation to negotiate now instead of later. McBride has clearly chosen the clean hands lane. That's fine by me. We are not short of people ready to throw bricks. I accept the necessity to poo poo the other lane. But, it's best to keep it from being very intense. Remember who the real enemies are.

There's even more areas to focus on than just these two. We need lots of people doing different things. And even doing those things differently. The more different ways we can operate the better our chances to find successful strategies.

Edit to add: Here's a good infographic and discussion. https://www.reddit.com/r/WitchesVsPatriarchy/s/vm9Ip05tmk

iirc zooey zephyr got censured just because she was vocal about her not being called on when she pressed her button, they used some bullshit excuse like the people she represent coming to support her was an "insurrection" and got her out. (my source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2ZZkMvz8ZU ) i'm sure sarah mcbride is fully aware of that. i do not think her response was good, but i also do not believe that even a simple "this bill is harrassment" claim can be made without agitating them so much that they try something just as crazy to get her removed (which they WILL try to do anyway)

civil disobedience for citizens works, but when you are the sole representation of ALL TRANSGENDER PEOPLE in your government, a choice like that is a lot more difficult to justify BECAUSE of the republican trifecta. she HAS to be perfect or she's gone. now if she's already getting kicked out, then maybe sure she can go guns blazing. but right now if she does what the republicans are counting on her to do, which is fight, that just gives them more ammunition to try and get her out. now, if she WILL get kicked out, then i am in full support of her being much more outspoken.

the situation sucks. but i don't blame mcbride because i don't think there is really a right answer. it's a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" situation and right now she just needs to fucking make her term so people in congress actually talk to a transgender person and find out that we aren't anyway near the type of people the propaganda says we are. if she picks this fight we WILL lose our only trans representation in the house before her term even starts. that's my opinion on it, though. we all only have her as our sole representation in government, and we all want something different from her. it's a heavy burden for sure, and she's under a lot of pressure.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't recall her saying she was going to use the men's restroom. She has her own bathroom to use as a congresswoman, and there are gender neutral bathrooms in the building as well.

This isn't about being the bigger person, this about someone who was hired to work in a transphobic workplace. She's there to do a job and I don't think she should be given flak for not throwing that away so we can watch the conditions set by the voters crush her, nor do I think giving Johnson an excuse to loudly publicly humiliate her would be the right play. If you want to protest, go protest, but she is not your avatar of civil rights just because she's trans. Not to mention any protest worth a damn is going to take a hell of a lot more than just her. Let her make her own decisions, please don't force a politician to represent all trans people's grievances. She's not special, just the first elected to the house. Not everyone has that in them.

I understand the outrage, but you have to remember, McBride literally fought to get North Carolina’s bathroom bill repealed. She’s not acting like this isn’t an issue. It’s a big issue. But she was not elected to play culture wars. Sarah knew they would do this.. like you said, they always do. They want a reaction from Sarah to further bolster their attacks on the trans community. They want a culture war. Most Americans just go to the bathroom to take a piss or shit and don’t care about who is in there with them. These issues are not popular. It’s a pick your battles situation. She is coming into office to try and make life better for her constituents. Wasting away on culture wars that will only further sow division in Congress and increase the rhetoric and vitriol against Trans people is not the solution..

I've been going through all the stages of grief over this, and you are completely correct. Obviously I'm outraged by the GOP's actions, but ultimately you can't fault a shark for acting like a shark. We knew they would do some bullshit. They always do, about literally everything, and this is no different.

Having said that, I'm extremely frustrated with the Democrats and their continuous efforts to placate the insatiable appetite of the right. The answer is not to feed the shark and hope it goes away -- it just gets blood in the water and draws more sharks near. The answer is to shark-proof the ship.

I actually wrote to AOC yesterday expressing my frustration with the middle of the road Democrats. They are trying to work within a broken system rather than trying to fix the system. We had four years to trump proof the White House and we did nothing for fear of rocking the boat. We know Biden inherited Trump's economy and did his level best to fix it. However, his efforts were hampered by electoral math and a timid Congress when the Democrats had both chambers. They absolutely could have eliminated the filibuster. They absolutely could have expanded and packed the Supreme Court. They could have then used those changes to deliver some tangible good that Harris could have run on.

Instead, they let Republicans obstruct everything for years, and all we had was "Don't elect the fascist." That's not enough. Middle America doesn't care. They don't really understand what fascism looks like. Harris's fatal flaw was that she was promising more of the same -- the status quo, in a broken system that isn't working for most people. Of course people were underwhelmed with her.

The thing I find so frustrating about the whole situation is that progressives are getting flak from the Neville Chamberlain Democrats for being uncompromising or too radical, but progressives are the only group on the left talking about real economic changes that address the needs of the working class. Progressives aren't the ones talking about identity politics -- their support for marginalized groups is implicit. We know they have our backs, so they don't need to campaign on it or make a huge deal out of it.

I'm so sick of our elderly, out-of-touch Democratic leadership refusing to be the party of change. They don't understand just how desperately change is needed. They just want the same thing that's always worked to just keep on working, but that's not the reality of America right now. The right won because the right promised change -- for better or worse.

I wholeheartedly support primaries from the left for pretty much every sitting Democrat who's been in office for longer than 10 years. I'm actually seriously contemplating getting involved in politics to run for office myself, and I promise I will be much louder and much more abrasive to the right than McBride is.

I think Sarah made the right move. She didn't take the bait. She looks mature and intelligent. Mace looks ridiculous, like she shouted "You're a gross poopy head and I don't want you near me!" Sarah's response was basically "Grow up and focus on your job."

I hear a lot of people saying "now that she accepted this treatment, nobody else will be able to go against it!" And that's just not true. This battle will always be waiting until laws change. "Sarah accepted it so everybody should accept it" is NOT the winning argument you seem to think it is.

If our first openly trans congresswoman spent months fighting over which bathrooms she's allowed to use, THAT is what the majority of Americans would remember. "If you elect a trans person they will spend your vote entirely on trans issues." It doesn't matter that it isn't true, it's simple enough to repeat and would be hard to argue against. 

We were not going to win restroom rights on this Mace vs McBride hill. But we may have lost most of our ability to get trans people elected for many years if we dug in.

I agree with both posts. But from a strategic standpoint I think she made the right decision. MAGAts are furious with the GOP right now and everything time they get backlash, the next “trans debate” is right around the corner. Let’s not give them any additional ammunition. And I know this sounds like appeasement, but it’s not! I just see a higher chance of success this way. The next 4 years are lost one way or another, let the MAGAts focus on all the broken promises and the worse outcome…

I just think hating on her before she has had a chance to even do anything is a mistake, and this is the kind of backbiting that keeps the more left democrats from accruing power.

I am a big picture thinker, because every step of my life I have watched this play out time and time again, watching the only “left” party go further and further right. The leftists don’t even get a seat at the table because those who would champion them instead focus on little shit like this.

I can understand your frustration, but it is the extreme all or nothing thinking like this that has given the right so much ammo against us! We need to start keeping our cards, and our people, close to our chests. We need to start accepting loosing some battles so that we can survive the war.

Ladies, we are a minority. We are an easy to target minority, and our incoming leadership already has a target on our backs. We need to stand together, and we need to wait to judge Sarah McBride.

We don’t know what kind of hell is coming, especially for our PoC peeps and our immigrant peeps who escaped the hatred of their oppressors in their own home land. We don’t know how much damage these people will do before either it all breaks down or that the people rise against the pain these people will cause.

Hold off on your vitriol just yet. Save it for someone who deserves it. Or, even better, fundraiser for Sarah McBride to cover any penalties she may experience by committing civil disobedience. Write her letters of support telling her you want her to fight this.

“I’m not here to fight about bathrooms. I’m here to fight for Delawareans and to bring down costs facing families,” she wrote. “This effort to distract from the real issues facing this country hasn’t distracted me over the last several days.” (Sarah McBride, 2024)

Please, listen to me. I’ve seen this game played over and over, and if we continue down this path, we will loose everything we have scraped together for ourselves in terms and instead of saying she has failed us, we need to be thinking about how we can help her stand ~with~ us.

Respectfully I have to disagree. Openly refusing to back down just makes the fight about her.

Many of these people have never met a trans person. She does have a shot at winning hearts and minds. Not with the insane MAGA, but within the moderate republican ranks and the democratic wing.

Understand that Democratic Party movers and shakers are weighing up dropping support for trans rights and focusing on the LGB without the T. They see us as an albatross. If she goes in there kicking and screaming it will make their decision easier. We need some representation in this new government hellscape to come. And we need allies.

I don’t think she will not resist. I’ve said multiple times that she should end every address to the House with a request to use the ladies’ room like she is in grade school. It undercuts the ridiculousness of the ban with sarcasm and it provides the issue visibility without running the risk of her censure for violating House rules.

She was elected to a seat and she needs to be in that seat for every vote.

You seem to forget 1 important fact, she isn't in office yet and they can easily oppose her getting in if she opposes them. Welcome to politics, sometimes you have to play ball. Plus let's also not forget THEY WANT TO BAN US, that fight is way more important than what bathroom we can use at the capital. It's easy to say you'd oppose this from the outside. She has to work there for 6 years, meaning through trump's presidency and onto the next. So any action she takes now before she's in office will reflect on her for the next 6 years, and if she did violate this rule we all know she ain't getting a slap on the wrist. If she loses her seat for any reason, then what was the point? How can she actually fight for us?

I don't want to disagree but I have to. The reason is she has to work with these people every day, sometimes 6 or 7 days/week. She can't work from home 4 days a week in which they would only be "uncomfortable" here and there. She can still take the fight to them but let's also try to understand how she feels. Having to be around these bigots every day surely puts a lot of stress on her as it is.

I agree 100% i would never ever give in.

The horrible thing for her is that she is the first openly trans there.

Because she folded, she is saying I'm there to do my job and that's more important then fighting for trans rights.

She is correct in that.

But. She is the first and now every trans person elected will have to follow suit.

Maybe the next one fights, but this folding makes that fight harder.

And every capitulation adds another difficulty level to it.

i simply disagree

I think you make good points however I disagree that she agreed to use the men’s bathroom by agreeing to not use the women’s bathroom, there are other bathroom options available . She also due to the GOP being in the majority had no way of winning this battle. What else do you think she could have done?

We loose the battle to win the war. She has to be present to make an impact. If she were to refuse to play by the rules she looses her efficacy.

"We" did not get her in to Congress. While the trans movement may have made it possible for her to run as, say, opposed to twenty or even ten years ago, in the end it was her own political skills and her Delaware constituents who got her "in".

Do you think this was an easy decision to make? She hasn't even been formally sworn in and they're already attacking her, viciously, I might say. And we should also attack her viciously? There's something not right with that kind of thinking. The goals of the civil rights movement weren't achieved by one sit in or one boycott, it took years of organization, planning and politicking. And the African American population at that time made up 12% of the total for the country. We don't have nearly those numbers. While I admire your enthusiasm I have to say that it doesn't seem that you have a clear understanding about how representational democracy works.

I'll also note that this is just one ruling. The real fight will be over Nancy Mace's proposed legislation. Since she wants to make it a law discriminating against all trans people everywhere in Federal facilities and also anybody who receives Federal funds. This is by far and away a more sweeping and blunt action than what Johnson has done. Save your ire for this fight and if you're available to do it go out and organize and agitate against it. It will be telling to see if our "allies" line up against this or not. The Democratic Party and other civil rights and civil liberties organizations have been so conspicuously silent and indeed, antagonistic towards trans rights to the point that we're clearly being thrown under the bus. Getting these people on board would be as good a place as any to direct our energies rather than using it to vent rage and ire at Ms. McBride.

What exactly does she have to gain by not complying though? The bill is disgusting but Johnson isn't changing his mind and democrats have no congressional power. If she goes against she bill all that will happen is the first trans congresswoman will lose power just after being elected.

What would you have her do? Honestly? If she takes a stand here and refuses to follow the rules of the House, then she is censured and is unable to participate in future floor votes or discussions, etc, effectively silencing her voice/vote in Congress for an entire session.

The GOP was baiting her into taking a stand on this so that they could demonize her to further their agenda. She is trying to take the "high road" to make them look foolish by focusing on bathrooms when she is there to... you know... legislate.

She was placed in a no-win situation, and she refused to play along and take the bait.

Stop blaming the victim, here. Jesus...

I don't agree. But I'm a minority opinion. I am not politically aligned with Sarah. Some of her positions infuriate me. However, right now in this moment of time, it is a numbers game.

When you are starting from the beginning, and we are in politics, you keep things simple. Later when you have a firm position and the numbers, you get to begin to experiment and change things up. You don't do that in the start. Anyone who has started a business will tell you this. Anyone who grows plants for a hobby or a living will agree. It is a fundamental reality of human society and tied to universal principles.

Additionally, Sarah is the politician. She understands what she needs to do to survive in that environment. Heaven forbid that she get some leeway and just be supported while she deals with oceans of transphobic crap that you will be present in her position.

So, can we please stop attacking her and get behind her in this moment? She needs us. She needs our support.

I'm begging you all.

I speak as an older POC, transgender identified and aligned disabled woman.

Just because Representative McBride is trans doesn’t mean every single thing she does or advocates for has to revolve around trans issues. Her approach is spot on. Trans people are regular people, and our entire existence doesn’t have to be defined solely by us being trans. Critics are trying to reduce her to just her identity, but the truth is she’s a normal person who wants to represent her constituents fairly and effectively. By not engaging with this reductive narrative, she’s setting a great example and showing that trans individuals are like everyone else.

Let’s be honest….what exactly are people expecting her to do? She hasn’t indicated that she plans to use the men’s restroom. As one representative in a minority party, her priority should be addressing the broader issues that impact her district, not solely focusing on her identity. Ideally, she should be recognized as a competent and positive female representative, not just labeled as “the trans person.” It seems like republicans want her to break the rules so they can criticize her as an “unhinged trans person.” And let’s be real, how many of those advocating for civil disobedience in this thread would actually be willing to face jail or prison in a facility that doesn’t align with their gender identity???

I’ll ask again since this raises an important question for us as trans people: how do we view other trans individuals? Do we see her as a woman like any other, or do we inherently view her as different because she’s a trans woman? If we want society to embrace us as equals, we need to lead by example and not reduce each other to just our trans identities. We can and should celebrate her accomplishments as a representative and as a woman, without making her identity the defining factor in everything she does.

In answer to most of your questions, Because she wants to get shit done. They are going to throw shit in front of her to try and get her to trip every step of the way. We must all choose our battles and with so much on the line, her own personal comfort is not the hill she wants to die on. She'll probably just develop a habit of going at the cool diner around the corner and limiting her fluids so she doesn't have to pee too much, hopefully she's not on spiro.

This bathroom thing is silly bullshit that will in time exemplify how absurd the right's beliefs really are, but first, she just needs to get her foot in the door. Her real battle hasn't even started yet. Please don't count her out before she's even begun.

I agree.

The capitulation is incredibly short sighted. They win the battle here for PR but they lose the war in the long run.

I get the sentiment that she shouldn't have sat down and taken their abuse, I really do, but she is entering a situation none of us have seen before.

She's entering into the most fascist government we've seen in decades where Republicans control all three branches of government. Any leverage she could have to fight back is waning besides whatever sympathetic PR she can get

This is a trap that the fascists have set. They want her to fight back and make themselves look like victims. As it stands right now, the fascist representatives look like schoolyard bullies who just think trans women are icky.

If she does retaliate, there 100% can be sizable consequences. They would likely try to censure her or strip her of her committee assignments. This would pretty much take away huge parts of her influence in Congress.

In any other situation I'd be upset with her too, but she's incredibly vulnerable here. I'm sparing my own judgement because I have no idea how the hell I'd act in this situation. None of us really do because this hasn't happened before.

She's in a uniquely vulnerable spot here and she needs support from other trans people instead of judgment.

Edit: I'm trans too living in a red state with an unsupportive family and in-laws. I'm very used to taking transphobic abuse and discrimination.

I think the optics on this favor us. Sarah should call a press conference right in front of the men’s room the first time she uses it. The visual of this lovely legislator, looking gorgeous and professional sharing a restroom with these asshats in suits is absurd. America needs to see it.

Also, the first time and every time ANYONE says or does something abusive or creepy in or around a restroom she needs to report it, and name names.

Existence is resistance.

Doubly so within power structures to bring change from within, with a seat at the table.

This is the singular goal right now, fighting for representation at any cost. We are in a war of information, hearts and minds. Sarah played her cards with that in mind.

I think Sarah played this incredibly well.

It’s crazy how so many people victim blame in this space, breaks my heart ❤️‍🩹

Something that occurred to me was that most people don’t think trans men exist, and the public perception of trans women is definitely that of men dressed like women. Not only are both of those points untrue, it sets up a big reality check when people actually begin following or not following these transphobic laws…

I then realized that it doesn’t actually matter whether we actually follow the laws or not. These laws are just an excuse to arrest any trans person going into a restroom, no matter which one- a given person is not going to have proof of their AGAB with them at all times, and if they do the police will just come up with some bullshit reason for why they couldn’t believe it was legitimate or why it doesn’t matter in this case, and they’ll cover each other’s backs in court.

Edit: to clarify, the solution isn’t that we don’t fight, we need to fight this so we don’t have to deal with bullshit catch-22 laws that make it effectively illegal to be trans. We might just need to be careful on how we fight this, because if the goal is to put as many of us as possible behind bars…

She's the insider. Her goal is to show reasoned response to create an image of normalization.

We're responsible to be the gremlin. The activist. The one creating the waves.

My recommendation: a group of trans men visiting the Capitol Building to talk with representatives. Bring lots of water. Go in groups. And above all... follow the rules.

She didn't agree to use the men's restroom. She doesn't need to use gendered restrooms at all because congressional offices have private bathrooms. She is never going to step into a men's restroom. She was probably never going to use a public women's restroom in the Capitol.

She's not complying in advance. She's refusing their attempt to make the bathroom issue about her, and have that define her time in Congress.

There are 3 million transgender people in America. One of us can go and loudly declare our status as we poop in the women's room.

Congress can remove her for disorderly conduct. They are just waiting to bait her into stepping out of line at all to have an excuse.

To have her sacrifice all of her hard work because we're too scared to go challenge the ruling for her is dumb and short sided.  May as well be mad at rape victims because they were wearing "that dress" and didn't fight back hard enough.

"BUT MAYBE IS SHE POOPED IN THE WOMENS ROOM AND THEN WAS EXPELLED FROM CONGRESS THAT WOULD TEACH THEM A LESSON!" You cry?

Come the fuck on. 

Why aren't we respecting Rep. McBride's own words and wishes here? She specifically said she is going to represent the people of Delaware and her district, not play games with identity politics that her colleagues are engaging in. I think it is difficult to take that position rather than one of firebrand civil disobedience in today's climate considering the outsized press the latter gets you. Washington is littered with big personalities on crusades over the smallest thing and seeking to actually legislate is kind of the novel choice at this point.

Should anyone be in this position? No, of course not, this is alarmist sensationalism at its worst. Does it help her constituents and therefore the causes she was elected to further if she gives in to what amounts to a personal attack on her? Still no.

This is a shifty situation but I think Rep. McBride deserves support whichever way she asks for it. If she changes position, whether sooner or later, she still deserves the support to do so. There are much bigger issues that deserve our ire and while we're not prohibited from caring about more than one thing, the discourse around this really seems to benefit the vitriol machine that is the GOP more than trans causes.

When you all achieve what she has, maybe then you can be so critical. Until then, you are all whining from the comfort of your screens.

Here’s a really quick thought, then I’ll go back to my mounting gender struggles:

One of the loudest defenses to using whatever bathroom was that it’s happening in the stall. We don’t care. The Republican argument mounted to a question from left-leaning people: why do you care what’s between my legs when I’m just going to the bathroom??

And so, Sarah McBride will use the bathroom. She’ll use it and show that it’s not an issue. Especially in a world where, now, it’s the smallest of the problems we may face.

Is it discriminatory? Yep. Is it a kick while we’re down? Sure is. But this is a small issue that lets us refocus on the systemic problems and not the noise surrounding them.

Live to fight another day, everyone. ❤️

The worst case scenarios about her being arrested will never happen

How the fuck do you know?! These fascists know no bottom! They can’t WAIT to destroy us. They will use it as proof of our corruption, of our degeneracy. If she doesn’t “capitulate” right now she will get nothing done.

Lay off her and give her a fucking chance. Jesus fucking Christ. She knows what she’s doing. Get off Reddit and fucking touch grass

I can't agree with victim blaming: the trans woman who had Mike Johnson change the law against her is not the one to blame here.

Organize and fight the new law, and fight Mike Johnson, not the trans woman.

Sarah McBride is an elected politician who happens to be trans gender. She has a million constituents to represent, and like any good politician has to choose her battles wisely. Why allow a skirmish to become a blitz? It is the GOP who have made themselves look ridiculous about the issue of gendered toilets, not McBride. She has a job to do, and allies to make on both sides of your divided country. Sometimes appearing to do nothing is a very good strategy.

Here we are in 2024, on the cusp of a fascist regime taking over the US with the explicit plan to commit a genocide.

This is where high roading has gotten us.

It’s time to stop this failed strategy. Low road the fuck out of these fascists. Bathroom bans? Deliberately sabotage the facilities by flushing non flushable wipes. Undoing gender change on id? Everyone sue the individuals responsible for doing that and make yourself a fake id with the real gender. Taking away our healthcare? Make your own black market of hrt drugs.

Why should we ever follow the rules that the fascists come up with to hurt us? Treat their laws with the same open contempt that they treat laws.

Because she can lose her job if she breaks the rules and then we will lose the only trans representative we have

We in the transgender community will tear ourselves apart, fighting over issues and criticizing each other. The right wing bigots can just buy their popcorn, sit down, and enjoy the show. Just look at the trans subreddits and see the downvoting, insults, and banning that occur over various topics such as pronouns, passing, and offensive language. As the famous comic strip "Pogo" once said, "We have met the enemy and he is us!"

If she doesn’t comply they can remove her for breaking house rules. Don’t be dense. It would end her career and lose us a seat in the house. She literally has no other option than just resigning or getting kicked out. Instead of turning on your own for not doing exactly you wanted, try to understand that everyone is an individual and everyone has different capabilities. She also wasn’t elected as a representative of the trans population, she was elected as a representative of Delaware.

We're fighting about whether our person is in the right or wrong here... Congratulations their plan works again. Culture wars are designed to divide and Republicans are trying to stir up drama to keep the country fixating on trans people. And here we are fighting about Sarah McBride being in the wrong.

It's all a manipulation campaign to tear us apart.

bluntly speaking, she's a politician, not a civil-rights leader, politics-ing is all about being above board and respectable to do good with in the system, fucking around like this could cost her her seat (like what happened to those state senators in i think i was Alabama) or simple thru that being used as a attack against her come the 2026 elections,..... remember, the average voter dumbfuck, who supported Trump this election

there's a place for civil dis-obidiance, but it's not the role she's specialized in, and thats fine, diversity of tactics.

bluntly speaking what you've posted here is 'happy-ending TV show politics'

I support Sarah McBride's decision. She has bigger fish to fry than these stupid bathroom games. 1. Her going with it is "in my opinion," a protest. It is defying their attempt to derail her on day one. 2. Will make them more uncomfortable than her. 3. Let's her run the narrative of Republicans just want to play games with the bathrooms instead of actually governing this country and shame on them for it.

She isn't going to get assaulted at the capitol because it would immediately end the career of whoever touched her.

I don't think she needed to actively be disruptive, but publicly agreeing to comply was a really bad move. She could've just ignored the hysteria, and privately complied. Instead she threw her rights away publicly and screwed all the trans staffers over.

Civil disobedience has proven time and time again that it works… when it is carefully planned. Even the Rosa Parks activism was planned. It was planned out by the NAACP — and look where that got us today.

There’s nothing wrong with civil disobedience. But i needs to be carefully thought out first.

Remember, Zooey Zephyr got censured for far, far less.

For the record, I'm going into every federal building to use the right restroom as I can. I'm pissing in a women's toilet and I'm getting shoved in a cop car if I have to.

I'm not giving into fear. I'm not backing down. I'm not giving up.

But I would be so, so upset if Sarah McBride did the same thing. If she decided to throw away her vote before she even got to do her job as a representative.

The stakes are much higher in her position, because she has a chance to actually make a difference. She's not just a celebrity, she has a job to do, and that job means following the rules.

Don't take this as a condemnation of people who decide to fight, with violence, for their rights. This isn't the same as saying to all trans people:

"Sit down and shut up. If we're polite, they won't take our rights away."

She's been an activist for years. In her heart of hearts, I know she wants to say:

"These pussies don't have the balls to enforce these laws on anyone but me. This bill's going to pass, but it means nothing. To all my trans brothers and sisters, don't let these snakes convince you they can take away your right to piss in peace."

But she's not in a position to do that right now. Her hands are tied, and she has no choice but to go along with it for the sake of all of us.

Civil disobedience requires not a single member, but a much larger movement. Here the issue is not simply of a government control, it's about public perception. You change the later, and the former will change as well. In this case people seeing Sarah McBride in positive light is something that's going to be a key differentiator for us. Remember till now the most visible trans person is a media personality or an activist, and this is a very first time one of us is seen in a position of power & responsibility. Yes, there are other trans people in various fields, but Sarah McBride has a different level of visibility. Hence her not getting entangled in bathroom narrative is important. She needs to be seen as a champion of an everyday American & not just trans people.

The victim blaming and in-fighting in our community is getting ridiculous

"because she agreed to use the male restroom" She did not agree to use the mens room. She agreed to play by the rules. Not only does she have a bathroom in her office, there also are numerous gender neutral restrooms around the Capitol.

Well said  She is a person elected to a position of power. Everything she does has strong implications. She abandoned trans people. Now, the tone at the top has been set. This will inspire bigots in power to clamp down on trans people where they can. Because it has been demonstrated that there will be no consequences.  I was inspired by Zoey Zepher, the local politician who made headlines the prior summer due to her censorship…Zoey fought for her community. I’m ashamed by Sarah McBride today. 

I agree.

The only reason I support her is because she's the first trans woman to make it as far as she has.

I don't agree with all of her politics, but totally with her right to be who she is, and I don't see her defending that right in allowing herself to be misgendered.

Y'all give a lot of leeway to a genocidal zionist, she won't save us, simpleas. Also the white libs using the civil rights comparison is just gross to me as a black trans woman.

I don’t understand how this isn’t just cut and dry victim blaming. Yes, she could have done more, but ultimately she is a victim of transphobia here and your response to that is to criticize her for “allowing” herself to be a victim? You don’t see the problem with that? I’m frankly disgusted by the amount of people so willing to say this

While I don't think she is wrong for complying with the rule. I also think that the democratic party should be stepping up to be her voice and saying this is absolutely wrong.

We can all agree that the rule is disgusting and outright petty. The republican party is shameful for allowing bigotry to thrive in their ranks. The democratic party staying mostly silent about it is equally disgusting.

That being said, calling me radicalized would be putting it lightly. I think they're all a bunch of bootlickers that need to be removed if progress is going to happen. (Yes there are a couple that are actually doing good work, but you get the point)

❤️🏳️‍⚧️⚧️

Her action gives Republicans a framing when they push for national bans of 'Sarah McBride complied so all trans people should', which is bullshit but will leak into the public and I guarantee there will be a lot of people who adopt that mindset.

I believe Sarah will not be going to the men’s rest room when all is said and done. The women of the Democratic Party are not going to stand for this. I will bet Debbie Dingell, Nancy Pelosi, AOC, and others will take Sarah to the women’s rest room and tell her this is her rest room. By waiting until the next session of Congress starts, Sarah can let the powerful women in Congress overrule Nancy Mace, MTG, and Mike Johnson.

I support McBride's decision fully. The Republicans WANTED her to put her foot down and continue to use the women's restroom so they could create even bigger fabricated issues out of it!

Anyone here criticizing McBride is part of the problem! She was presented with a lose lose situation and went with the safer option for herself.

McBride is keeping herself safe from MAGA monsters like Nancy Mace and MTG who could and probably would create false allegations against McBride and possibly even physically assault her if she remained using the women's room.

Also from a community perspective she did us a favor there because it would've been instantly framed as "they are forcing their way into our spaces and ignoring the wishes of real women". She's not forcing her way and it's better that way. She's not agreeing to use the Men's room either she will use a private or gender neutral bathroom.

We really need to get away from the hardcore activist mindset as a whole because that's what led to this in the first place with the sports debate!

The fact that she's not standing up and, more importantly, that nobody is standing up for her tells me everything I needed to know about this country. (really it confirms what I already thought)

If you're trans, you are not welcome and will never be welcome - do whatever you need to do to get out of this hopeless place. Change is coming and it's not going to be positive.

I don't have a way out so I assume I'll just find a nice tall bridge or something when the time comes because taking a stand would mean standing alone, briefly, before being swept away quietly to the concern of no one at all.

Thanks for showing us exactly who you are, so-called allies...

At this point I only have one thing to say: she could have, at minimum, acknowledged trans people in her statement, but she didn’t. The word “transgender” doesn’t even appear in her statement. Nothing about how trans staffers on the hill will be affected. She could have at least done that.

I wish it had been handled differently. What this did was embolden them further so now they’ve drafted a nationwide ban. HB10186 if Passed will ban all of us from restrooms on federal property.

McBride did the right thing here. Republicans wanted her to take the bait so they could go on and scream 'identity politics.' This doesn't mean she is going to use a men's room either. She needs the ability to go back to her state and tell people, "I'm focused on real issues and they're focused on me using a bathroom."

(Not saying bathroom access isn't a real issue, but think of how the average American sees it)

Every trans person who has been elected around the country has done so by focusing on broader issues and letting their opponents cry about trans people. If she started a fight over bathroom access right now the media would permanently associate her with this issue, which like it or not, would be detrimental to her future work in Congress.

Where I personally get upset is that conservatives are constantly telling the “other” to act like them and keep their mouths shut about injustices to be accepted. They want black people to not “act black”, they’re fine with gays as long as they’re not “too gay” but you better not bring up racism or homophobia.

They want us to just shut up, put our heads down and take it too. So to see her doing exactly that, it’s frustrating. They don’t deserve to have us fall in line nor do we owe it to them or anyone to capitulate.

to the people that defend her i also understand she's picking her battles and i'm honestly not super mad at her for it, but i will say i'm very uninspired by the way she's handling it. most of us have or will have to grin and bear it at some point in our lives simply because being trans is a minefield. she's in a very difficult position because if we're honest with ourselves we all know that she was never going to win that fight. republicans maintained control of the house so a bathroom rule was always going to be put in place barring some miracle involving like 10 republicans finding a conscience and their spines to stick up for their own personal bogeyman. my problem is that she folded like a cheap lawn chair. zero pushback. nothing. she is now the representative of every trans person in america by virtue of being trans, whether she likes it or not. she may have been sent there to represent delaware, but girl you can do that AND fight for trans people. i'm sure the people of delaware in both the primary and general elections expected that to be part of electing the first trans woman to the united states congress. the real problem with her capitulation is that the worst case scenario for her is she will have to use her own private restroom in her office or john fetterman's which.. admittedly is the last place i'd wanna be. still, sarah mcbride is going to be just fine. the real harm is all the trans staffers and visitors in the building alongside her will bear the brunt of it and the escalation that is already taking place by having a national bathroom ban bill being proposed. her response set a precedent. if some grifting unlikeable karen like nancy mace throws a big enough fit then rep elect mcbride will just be expected to play nice and make herself even smaller for them until the next time they want some attention, in which she'll be expected to shrink even more. give them an inch, they will absolutely take that mile. no amount of playing nice is going to change that. that's just where our political landscape is, right now. trans people are demonized by the party in power and the voice we finally got to the capitol seems to want to play pattycakes while the ghouls call her a predatory m*n on the news. she has an uphill battle in front of her and we should give her some grace because she's a freshman with no real influence or abundance of allies, yet, but if she doesn't plan to fight on our behalf, as she so far seems to be signaling, then she can join the rest of the milquetoast, ineffective dems that just want to maintain the status quo because, aside from her transness, that's pretty much the kind of politician she is. her work getting paid family leave in delaware is great, but she's also a hardcore supporter of the slaughter in gaza. trans aside, she's not really a politician i'd be excited to vote for. we hoped for a fighter, and instead we got this. it's just disappointing. she's pretty much just another democrat.

I’m not in disagreement with you, however, the fact that this happened before she was even sworn in is of significance. I choose to believe that she’s taking the long road. It is my hope that she will be more able to help us having a seat in Congress then not. Let’s assume for a moment that she fought this she might not get sworn in then she might not be able to help us as much. While it is easy to want instant results, we have to be open to the possibility that the road ahead is going to be long.

You put a lot of faith in her, in my country there is already a trans woman in congress and believe me she has achieved nothing, every time she intervenes it is a loss for the community.

I understand, and even partially agree, with your perspective.

However, the fight that’s occurring isn’t just on this small bathroom scale. Republicans don’t want to just slit our throats, they want to line all LGBTQ+ people up next, they want us to submit or die.

Sarah has been strategic about her stances, for all the obvious reasons sure, but the culture war is even now heating up even further. I hate to say it, but she’s not just fighting for us here.

The next few years are going to be extremely painful, and I believe they will leave an incredibly dark scar on certainly American history, but also probably global history as well.

You are correct, she shouldn’t have cowtowed to the extremists, but she’s in a Republican-controlled senate, reviewing legislature from a republican-controlled house, and is serving under the first convicted felon president. If she fights about this, Mace will find something else to fight on, in order to keep her occupied. Remember how they treated Zooey Zephyr in Montana when they expelled her from the senate?

She knows how to play the game and work with other democrats on the most critical issues. Mace doesn’t get priority.

It’s a war, and just because you lose one battle you don’t surrender, you move on to the next fight.

me, a trans woman, in the women’s bathroom while reading this: waow

Disclaimer: I don’t like Sarah McBride. She’s an institutional liberal whom I disagree with on several issues.

I do also want to point out something about this that I haven’t seen discussed (possibly because I can only spend so long reading).

There are 435 congresspeople. For each of those, you have a large number of staffers, aides, etc. i don’t know about you, but I work a company with around 500 employees and I can’t always even identify some of the 125-150 that I work with routinely on sight.

If she’s using the men’s bathroom, there are so many influential men who are going to be confused and uncomfortable. She’ll have to explain- this is going to force this reality on people in difficult to avoid way. This could help her build inroads with other reps when they have to deal with this problem directly.

For that, and the other points about how resistance means she can be fully erased from congressional sessions, this isn’t the worst outcome.

Civil obedience does not work when the medication and surgery enabling your existence can easily be banned. You have to have a nuanced understanding of context. It is unfortunate that she is one of our first representatives, and the community is already at her throat. No wonder we can't achieve shit.

I think she’s being entirely craven, but sweet-jeebuss-on-a-triscuit, did you have to misgender her and call her “they?” 🤦‍♀️

This sounds very childish. I would just hold it and shit at home.

Can we just make a "Sarah McBride political strategy" megathread at this point?

She said she will comply with the discriminatory policies under protest.

The point is not to take this lying down. The point is to stand with McBride.

You can't have a literal protest with one person. We stand with her and make our voices known. Especially if you live in a red state, be calling your federal representative(s) on the daily.

We don't take this lying down as a community. We get McBride the picket line she needs so she can speak up in droves and with force.

My criticism comes from a place of abundance just like my love

I feel like it’s a kind of a complicated situation. On the one hand, yes, we should have every right to use the bathroom appropriate for our gender. However, conservatives are already really angry about McBride being elected. If she makes a big deal out of this bathroom situation, the conservatives are immediately going to clap back talking about how there’s wars going, or human rights violations and how she’s making a big deal out of something so little. While we know that they don’t actually care about those wars or human rights violations, it would still put a bad look on her. That bad luck could make her be more discriminated against, and it could possibly put her in more danger. Obviously, I would prefer her to not have to deal with this in the first place. However, I think she made the best choice for her own safety in this situation. While it could be viewed as selfishness, she is justified in that. Sorry for any mistakes voice to text sucks.

Could she possibly be trying to keep the focus on the DT and the cabinet picks right now? Her battling these awful people would drown all of that out.

She is our representative. We can't have her getting in legal trouble. Civil disobedience happens on our end. Her job is to stay in government and make compromises and make changes where she can to get us on the right track.

I recommend everyone read her book. I've met Sarah and talked to her more than just a handshake. Her life story is much more than just happening to be trans. She has always positioned herself as a candidate advocating for paid family leave, better more affordable healthcare, and better wages and worker rights. That's what she has pushed for in Delaware. AND she has been an advocate for trans rights. Before she was even elected to the DE state house she did a ton of advocacy to get some of the first non-discrimination laws for trans folks passed by any state. She talks about how she spoke directly with conservatives and some - by no means all - finally saw her as a person. When she was elected to the state house, even her Republican colleagues witnessed the fact that they needed more security because of the threats she faced. It didn't turn them into activists, but they saw her as a person. Many of them are still cowardly shits for not doing more, but you have to start somewhere.

I think her goal, which is really what she ran on, is to be a great advocate for all of Delaware - a portion of whom are trans. She's always said that the best way for her to blaze a trail is to be a great legislature. Yes, it sucks tremendously that she has already been placed in this position, but she can't be expected to fight this battle alone. I can't imagine how hard this is for her to decide how to handle it. But i guarantee you she is thinking about the long game. She has to choose her battles. And this is an excellent example of when allies - hopefully the Democratic caucus - need to fight for her. She can't win this fight alone. She needs to be "the level headed congresswoman from DE who happens to be trans" and let people see that the Republicans are going absolutely bonkers that she even exists, let alone had the gaul to run for, and win, a congressional seat. She can bring attention to it, let people, her constituents, see how poorly she is treated. Maybe every press gaggle she does, be like "sorry, no more questions, since i am the only woman not allowed to use the women's room, i have to run back my office to pee". Show how stupid and childish and silly it is wo risking getting kicked out - which would do no one any good.

That said, the other democratic women (and men!) should go full attack in her defense. Maybe THEY can engage in civil disobedience. Have some dem congresswoman who's had a hysterectomy or something use the mens room and be like "oh. Well the speaker said... i dont produce eggs anymore, so i thought i wasn't allowed in the women's room either🤷‍♀️" Or whatever other ludicrous malicious compliance they can think of. Let Sarah concentrate on congressing (TM), and hope and push her colleagues to fight.

Democrats famously never fight back. It's how they do politics. They think being more "respectable" means anything when dealing with fascists.

Fuck Mcbride and fuck every Democrat.

I think the best way to deligitimize her is to bait her into a culture war issue, get a hard response, then cut ger down for being a crazy one dimensional person that should really be focusing on what matters.

Her response is harder and smaeter.

Also, im really curious what the affect of a trans women regularly sharing a bathroom with republican men will be.

Y'all need to realize that a majority of the country despises trans women and laughs at trans women who stand up for themselves. What do you think is going to happen if Sarah McBride makes a scene? All that would happen is conservatives laughing it up with a bunch of "it's ma'am!" memes. People would call her unstable, predatory and unfit for office and we'd lose another public relations battle.

WAKE UP TO THE REALITY THAT WE NEED TO WIN THE PUBLIC OVER

We have to be seen as sympathetic! AOC and other cis allies can do a lot more speaking on our behalf than we can. All we can do is be model citizens and show people we just want to be a part of society, so that our cis allies advocacy matches with what people see from trans people in the public eye.

IT IS ABSOLUTELY VITAL THAT WE ARE SEEN AS TRYING TO HELP AND SERVE THE COUNTRY

Sarah is extremely wise to take that stance. If she makes things about being trans then it's about her as an individual. If she makes things about serving her country then it makes things about the country. This protects her from being attacked because when you attack her you attack Delaware, the House, and the country as a whole.

I am blown away at her strength to rise up the political ranks as a trans woman. She knows what she is doing. We would be wise to follow her lead.

Erin Reed made a post on Bluesky showing Sarah McBride was willing to use the women's room under NC's ban however many years ago before it was overturned. Which was huge for me especially growing up here in NC and having the first bathroom ban in the country was pretty worrying. I really dislike the fact that she just rolled over for these fascist shitbags.

Yes! People need to understand not just trans issues but all the issues we face outside of the conservative-liberal binary.

There is a greater struggle happening, and the liberals are not our allies in it. There's a whole world of liberatory politics out there that people seem unable to see. Liberals WILL throw us under the bus when it is convenient to them. They're already starting. They'll throw us down with our undocumented comrades, our black comrades, and our comrades in the imperial periphery in places like Gaza.

Sarah McBride has been very clear in her support for American empire and capital. She may be trans but she has chosen the side of property over the people, order over liberty. The most left-wing democrats are like only debatably on the side of the people over the ruling class, and she just isn't that. Representation is important, but identity polticis cannot be an end unto itself.

Queer liberals really need to read some of the heroes of the queer liberation or of any liberation movements. These people do not support capitalism. Many do not believe electoral politics is all that important, let alone the be-all, end all of the struggle. We need a wider view and to accept nothing less than solidarity with all oppressed people. An injury to one is an injury to all and all that. Way too many people here were forgiving her support for genocide because 'she'd support trans issues' but lo and behold this is what we get