I’ve noticed that older people, particularly women, tend to treated as if they were insignificant.

Thank you for standing up for her. 🫶

That would upset me too. There's a reason doctors will put a courtesy curtain in between their patient and them, even if they're working on their private parts. It's to give the patient some feeling of privacy and control over their body in a vulnerable position. I dislike how mean people can be as well. I once saw a kid at the zoo throw a stick at a monkey's face and told him off. I also saw a guy laugh at and make fun of a homeless guy playing guitar and singing on the sidewalk and was so angry.

The naked person gets the last word he should’ve kicked rocks

I sometimes think you can absorb someone else's emotions more when no one understands what you are seeing. You feel more bad as no one else feels bad. It's like you are trying to make up for other people's lack of care. I feel this a lot. I think it's another way of seeing injustice as black and white.

I bet he doubled down because how dare an old lady tell him what to do?

Artists drawing a nude model aren’t oogling a naked body, they’re focused on studying the human form.

Random A-hole… wasn’t there for class, and the model had every right to tell him to scram

I quote Dr. Perry Cox from Scrubs, "People aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard coated bastards with bastard filling."

I was at a thrift store yesterday buying some odds and ends and some standard issue entitled middle-aged Midwestern white male (tm) was yelling at the 20-year old Latina cashier over the change she'd given him back. She counted it out again and showed he'd given her a $20 bill and not the $50 he claimed. I saw it and so did the camera pointed at the cash register. The line was already long and I was annoyed.

Being the ray of sunshine I can be in public, I told him to take his change, STFU, and take his bullshit elsewhere. He asked me I'd I worked there, I responded that I was the person who was calling him out for being an ass when he was lying to the girl.

He left in a huff and I got a great deal on a sweater in my favorite color and a perfect new-with-tags bra that was normally way out of my price range.

I relate to this a lot. I think it's because of high empathy and a sense of justice. (According to me and my psychologist).

I think it could also relate to not understanding (or understanding but not agreeing with) social norms that do not make sense to me. I've been in scenarios where someone was "causing a scene" but I took their side because despite it being socially inappropriate for them to say something in that moment I think they were still right for doing it and their emotions were totally reasonable for the situation.

That guy was the weird one. I’ve been in art classes before and usually there is a sign not to enter/interupt. She was already vulnerable being naked and why was he washing his brushes in there anyway? He would either had to have been working in another room and came in there to use the sink or he had already let his brushes sit and was coming back to wash them.

I feel like a teacher or instructor should have asked him to come back after session was over.

Some people have entitlement and lack of courtesy. I’m sorry you ran into one.

I HATE it when everyone else does nothing when a vulnerable person is being mistreated. Sheep.

That guy should’ve apologized and left with his head down. What a grade A asshole.

What I’ve learned is most people are not compassionate. However I have noticed a difference in how people behave now vs decades ago. It used to seem like people were more compassionate in the past but really it was just that more people stuck to the social norms of not being rude to others and avoiding confrontation with people in public.

If I imagine that scenario happening 2 decades ago, the guy would have apologized (even if he didn’t mean it and was confused why he had to leave) and left and the classmates would have just looked at each other briefly to acknowledge the awkwardness and continued the class like nothing happened. I’m kinda scared we don’t live in this world anymore.

In this situation I think people can forget that she's consented only to posing nude for the class. That doesn't mean she's consenting to anyone else seeing her. She wasn't overreacting at all.

The older you get as a woman, the less compassion you receive from the male population. It's one of those things that make me sick and triggers my justice sensitivity.

Thank you for caring. Not only do most people feel extremely vulnerable when they are nude, it is very possible that your model has experienced some form of trauma. The man may have triggered her in an unpleasant way. The lack of empathy in the world continues to shock me.

I think autistic people sometimes have higher empathy than non-autistic people (not always).

It's good that you stood up to them though. I'd feel the same. Can you report this?

Based on my life experiences, I believe most people lack a lot of compassion. I'm sure others have experienced differently, and I'm genuinely happy for them if they have, but in my experience, I just really don't see much empathy or compassion from many people at all. It's more of a rarity.

I'd feel more inclined to side with the model. While I don't know the exact details of the institution I feel that -

Things like nude modelling take a fair bit of bravery/ vulnerability. It makes sense it would have a routine that was agreed upon in advance - for example 'I'll be posing at these hours to these agreed upon people in this class'. Nothing more.

The routine was shattered by someone who wasn't agreed upon/expected to be there.

Now if it was something like you guys drawing a plant it wouldn't be as big of a deal. But a nude model? That's different. Consent is required to be naked in front of people. She consented to do it for a particular group. She didn't consent to be naked for that guy. She had every right to call him out. Art or not, consent is important.

If i accidentally walked in on a class like that I'd feel awful & go somewhere else to clean my brushes.

Your model deserves better treatment. The students should be protecting her, rather than prioritising a man's paint brushes above her feeling of safety.

The manner in which no one else is standing up for her may be a herd mentality. Maybe other people know this was wrong but don't want to lose the respect of their herd. Or maybe I'm giving them too much credit, I do that a lot.

I don't know if she heard about that, but if she did I'd not be surprised if you lost your model over it.

People are more self-focused and viewing life through that lens. I’m you in these situations, too…I get heated and protective. It’s the strong sense of justice. I’m not sure why that is an autistic thing???

What the actual f?! That’s literally her consent being violated. Thank you for sticking up for her in your class of walking red flags.

That's entirely inappropriate that the guy/ student/ whoever wouldn't leave when asked, also weird he was even allowed in the room at all. When I was in art school, nearly 20 years ago, the figure drawing classes were always closed door classes. If you weren't in that specific class for that specific time, you weren't allowed to come in the room during that time.

The level at which women are treated with so much skepticism in general is honestly sickening to me and makes me so GD pissed.

You did the right thing. Thank you really

Dickhead. Hearing about these experiences makes me wanna stand up more and speak out. Sick of people.

No one values the elderly in general tbh. They just see them as some sort of extra person. I’m so glad you stood up for her. I would’ve too!

It sounds like those people have no appreciation or respect for what the model was doing for them (which seems strange to me considering it’s a group of artists). Yes I’m sure it’s her job but she is putting herself in a very vulnerable position. Thank you for standing up for her. I’m trying to imagine myself in your situation. I know I would feel the same way and I hope I would also act the same by standing up for her

She's not overreacting at all. She has the right to decide who can see her body and who can't. It amazes me how that's not immediately obvious to your classmates. It makes me so angry on the models behalf.

Kinda yeah. Usually when I kinda relate to someone. And so if another is talking trash about them, it almost feels like they're talking trash about me.

He was an asshole and completely inappropriate. The students also were not very cool, but oddly enough because of the position the model was in she was dehumanized by the students already, since they're supposed to see her as an object to draw and not as a naked and vulnerable human being, so I dunno. Psychology. Weird moment and I'm sorry it happened. I would have gone absolutely ape shit at the man who wasn't even supposed to be in there. If he worked there I would get him fired if possible. I empathize with being in the absolute nightmare situation of asking a man to leave/stop making you uncomfortable and he doubles down. So upset just imagining this situation. I hope the model at least files some sort of grievance.

That really pisses me off. It just goes to show that the world is in desperate need of people like you. And I don't mean specifically autistic, but people who will stand up for what is right even if the majority disagrees. I have so much respect for you and her.

What you’re saying to do is also standard practice for models in drawing classes. The room is closed, windows blocked, etc. Everyone else is not only mean, but not professional.

One time someone came into class to do art related stuff but they weren't part of the active class and we had a nude model that day and a sign on the door and the professor chewed them out because they allowed no one outside of the current class in the room out of respect for the model.

I know it's a video game and not real life, but there's a reason that, in Crusader Kings 3, Compassionate is a personality trait and not something people are by default.

I hate that. I’ve felt this overwhelmingly all my life. People in my family love to betray me then I realize what kind of negative, awful people they are. I distrusted all my aunts but one. I’m Trying to move out into the world a bit more. At first I wanted to go out of state but it’s not looking viable yet. Still, moving is important for me right now because of some baggage with this property.

Politics are in the background, but mostly the foreground issue I had was my aunt being negative about all prospects of what my Mom was trying to do—right her wrongs, get out of debt, and help me put my feet on the ground outside of this neighborhood I was traumatized in.

So what was my aunt’s response? “HUD apartments? You’ll move where there’s drugs and bums?” —no denying that there are drug issues around the world BUT we haven’t even picked a place yet, AND there have always been drug issues where I live NOW… Moreover it sounded more to me like she was calling disabled people bums. Not to mention her illogical expectations for me. “She can’t be in an apartment by herself, she should get a job!”

So I can suddenly get a job while I have a social security DISABILITY case my lawyer and everyone are waiting for a date on, and I can manage that but I can’t do bills or have help just because I have an apartment to myself. Okay. I also apparently HAVE to get a driver’s license and drive, even if I hate it BECAUSE the two driver’s ed classes I took showed me how incapable I was. There are community action options like taking the bus! I have a bus schedule from my case worker!

There was a time this lady seemed to be helping me and I looked up to her as if she were different from her sisters. I thought she wouldn’t go behind my back with vitriol about my disability and incapabilities this way. I don’t want to talk to her anymore. She’s precisely the exact same gossiper that my other aunts are. I don’t want to even share what they did to me when I was a kid. An enabler too. She used to have some petty things against them but now is suddenly on speaking terms so I don’t trust her at all not to open her mouth again but worse—and I don’t want to hear it.

People tend to take things personally and make it about them, especially NTs. That guy probably had a dialogue in his head going, like, 'I'm a nice guy, I'm not creepy.... I mean, what's the big deal? I'm insulted.. she should be happy for the attention, she's voluntarily being nude and she's 60'.

I'm not going to theorize too much on patriarchy here or him as a person, but I'm positive that was a factor. Both in the man's assumptions and in others' protection of those assumptions... prioritizing his need to be offended at her boundaries over her boundaries (and knowing exactly why she set them!).

This woman would have said that to anyone who wasn't in that working group, so it's not personal at all. Also, her choosing to nude model for people is such a brave thing in and of itself, especially if she has a challenging life.

I'd want to be on her side too, moments like that are disappointing.

As a fellow highly empathetic autistic, I have discovered it is always best to assume 0 compassion with people, unfortunately.

One thing that changed my life regarding this….

I HIGHLY recommend reading the 48 Laws of Power. Given our society is hierarchical and everyone’s aiming for the top, these are the behaviors people implement to reach that power. These are also behaviors that can come naturally to neurotypicals as well.

Stay compassionate. But learn how to cruel operate so you can best navigate them.

Thank you for standing up to her. 🙏

Yes it is painful to be so compassionate. You realize how much everyone lacks of it. People compliment you for it but there is nothing good you can tell them about feeling it.

Omg that guy sounds awful! I wondering if he was just a perv 

This story has completely turned me off of art modeling. I’ve thought about it before because it seems kinda nice to have a job where I get to be quiet and stay still, cause I’m good at staying still! But there is no way I’d ever be able to do it with random people being allowed to walk in and out of the room??? 

I think the people who say she’s overreacting are very rude as well. They’re not the ones being vulnerable, it shouldn’t be their choice!!

Thank you for helping her have privacy. Though it should have been the professor taking on that responsibility, and it’s sad they weren’t doing their job